|Seriously 4:45am is way early.|
James and I have a different relationship than most people. Whether that is good, bad, or otherwise is yet to be determined, haha. I would say it works for us. We don’t have a formula or magic recipe that we follow and what works for us may not translate to other relationships. We also haven’t figured everything out…but what we do well, we do well.
When I was brainstorming what to write, I was thinking about the move. Loading up the truck, driving for days across the country, early mornings/late nights, unloading the truck, and unpacking all the boxes…any one of these things can be stressful and for me, stress exacerbates snarkiness. In thinking about the move, I was shocked and surprised that we didn’t have a fight or moments of intense snarkiness. In reflecting on what worked while moving, I realized we had hit a growth point. We reached a deeper understanding or point of connection.
|We have grown a lot since a long January weekend.|
Let me explain. Early on in our relationship, we would miss each other. I’m not talking about longing or hoping to be next to each other…I’m talking about completely missing the cues of the other. We would miss sacrifices that were made, invitations to explore deeper emotions/values, or expressions of affection. In thinking about the move, I realized that James and I have come to a place where we recognize the sacrifices of the other, more than our own. Everything about the move was far from sunshine and roses, but it was a lot more challenging to be frustrated or annoyed by the small things when I saw how James was working to support us. My agenda melted because I was able to recognize things in James, evaluate what to correct and what to accept, and how to promote the relationship rather than hurt it. Point blank, some things don’t matter. What does matter is my relationship with James. The move was less stressful and more enjoyable because we were able to focus on the other and our relationship. I was looking for ways in which James was working to support me and help out rather than pointing out how his ways were different than mine (note: I was successful at this most of the time. I mean, we’re all human,right? ;) )
|FYI...Northern Arizona is desolate beauty at its best.|